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How to deal with your bad neighbors, page 7 of 7

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Short, loud, random noises will work for you!

How do you deal with your bad neighbors? I'm not saying that, with the help of a large sledge hammer and a piece of wood, you make short, loud, random noises in the middle of the NIGHT.

And, I'm not saying that, every time you feel like it, you place the wood against a common wall, and whack the crap out of it. Only once.

But, if you did, the noise you would make would be short and really-really loud. And then, for a while you wouldn't have to deal with your bad neighbors.

Why? Because, if you did it in the middle of the night, when you got up to use the toilet, it would also be a random noise.

And because short, loud, RANDOM noises are extremely hard to locate. Especially when your bad neighbors are startled out of dead sleep.

Stink bombs will work for you!

How do you deal with your bad neighbors? I'm not saying that you throw a load of stink bombs on your bad neighbors' pathway or doorstep.

However, if you did, then for a while you wouldn't have to deal with your bad neighbors.
Why? Because when your bad neighbors stepped on them, their shoes would pong for many weeks. And because those stink bombs couldn't be traced back to you.

The winters will work for you!

In winter time, how do you deal with your bad neighbors, and how do you have FUN at their expense? I'm not saying that, with the help of a garden hose from your balcony, you spray several layers of water onto your bad neighbors' car. However, if you did, then, by the morning your bad neighbors' car would be encased in ice that is so thick that it is almost impossible to remove.

And then, for a while, you wouldn't have to deal with your bad neighbors. Why? Because it would really bug your bad neighbors! And because the ice couldn't be traced back to you. And, did you know that it's not illegal to attempt to wash your neighbor's car? And also because you COULD say, "I didn't do it; it was old man Winter that did it!"

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